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Tuesday, February 05, 2008
Something has been bothering me since yesterday...

i asked one of you whether I have a kind of "i-m-attached-and-i-m-not-interested-in-making-new-friends" look, you corrected me by saying "u have the look like 'I'm tired of getting into r/s so don get near me' ".

Bang! Snap! Clap! Bingo!

thats the description that i m looking for.

seriously, i m really like what he said. i m too tired, too lazy, too scared to get into another relationship. tired of getting to know ppl better, tired of playing the game called flirting and chasing, afraid of meeting yet another heartbreaker, afraid of giving trust again when i already don't trust ppl easily.

but i hate myself, hate him, for making me like this. how can i give up on love just because i failed once (did i actually fail?). i am still so young and my heart already feel so old.

you may say one shouldn't try too hard in getting into a relationship, it depends on fate. i tell you no, efforts are needed. no one would ever be so stupid to keep giving when he/she doesn't receive anything back in return.
but then again, i don't feel like giving any love to anyone right now, i don't know who to give, i don't know how to give, i don't know how much to give.

maybe, come one day when i really find someone i like, then things would be different.... til then, i just wanna study hard and play hard at the moment.

~make me fall in love with you~



munched @ 5:15 PM

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